“What does that mean?” Walter asked.
“It means you won’t be staying with her much longer.”
My fingers twitched beneath the blanket.
That accident proved she can’t keep you safe.
Walter’s voice was suddenly small. “I’m going home with Granny.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Yes, I am.”
Lisa sighed. “Walter, she’s getting older. She can barely see. She shouldn’t even have been driving.”
“She has glasses.”
You won’t be staying with her much longer.
“Clearly they didn’t help much, did they?”
I felt my pulse jump.
Lisa continued, quieter now. “Soon everything will be where it should’ve been years ago.”
“What does that mean?”
“You’ll understand later.”
She’s getting older.
“Why can’t you just tell me?”
“Because you’re nine.”
“So?”
“So stop asking questions.”
I heard her handbag zip shut.
Everything will be where it should’ve been years ago.
Then her footsteps moved toward the door.
Before leaving, she said, “You should start getting used to the idea of living with me.”
The door closed.
I waited.
Walter touched my arm. “She’s gone.”
Stop asking questions.
My eyes opened. “What the hell was that?”
“That wasn’t the first time she said it.”
“How many times?”
“I don’t know. A lot.”
“Walter.”
That wasn’t the first time.
“Maybe four? Five?”
“While I was unconscious?”
He nodded.
“What exactly did she say?”
“That you might not wake up. And even if you did, I probably couldn’t live with you anymore.”
Maybe four? Five?
“Why?”
“She said because you’re old.”
“I’m sixty-one!”
“I told her that.”
Despite everything, I almost laughed.
I probably couldn’t live with you anymore.
Walter continued, “She said your eyes were bad, too. And that the accident proved you couldn’t take care of me.”
That’s when an old memory came back to me.
***
Four years earlier, three days after my son’s funeral, Lisa cornered me. “I need Walter to live with me.”
“You needed money last week.”
The accident proved you couldn’t take care of me.
“This isn’t about money.”
“Then what is it about?”
“He’s my brother’s son.”
“And I’m his grandmother.”
“You’re not exactly young, Mom.”
I need Walter to live with me.
“And you are. You go out, chase your business, worry about money. Since when do you want to raise a nine-year-old?”
“Maybe I’m ready for something more than that.”
“You barely call him, Lisa.”
“That doesn’t mean I don’t care.”
“You didn’t care enough to show up. So why do you suddenly want him living with you?”
