For years, I was the mother who always said yes. I put everyone else first, even when I was exhausted and had nothing left to give. But after a painful family vacation in Brittany, my daughter finally realized what she had been doing to me. And at 62, I discovered something I should have learned decades earlier: loving your family should never mean losing yourself.

You are allowed to rest.

You are allowed to have plans of your own.

You are allowed to disappoint someone occasionally without becoming a bad person.

You are allowed to be more than the person everyone calls when they need something.

Your life is not a waiting room where you sit until everyone else is happy.

Your life is happening now.

And you deserve to be present for it.

Sometimes, loving people means giving them your time.

Sometimes, it means helping them through a difficult day.

And sometimes, it means teaching them that you are a human being, not an endless source of energy.

The people who truly love you may need time to understand.

They may make mistakes.

They may not immediately recognize the changes you are trying to make.

But give them the chance to know the real you.

The tired you.

The hopeful you.

The person who sometimes needs help, too.